The Essence

I keep losing it, it seems. Until I realise I am off the path.

Getting caught up in life is so easy. Getting caught up in the difficulties of racing....there is no money. Thinking of the sacrifices made, priorities and what could be saved if you choose to not risk everything just for something like a set of new tyres, or a chance at improving the condition of the car. What's it all for anyway? Is it causing that much extra pressure, to deliver the expectations of family and friends in life whilst still trying to play a game?

It's my game. It's my sport. It's my escape. It's my dream and it's what makes me.

"All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity; but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dream with open eyes to make it possible."

Get on with it, Zaahir.

Kyalami - 26/01/2008 - Round 1

Sigh.

I was amped, but it was quite disappointing. I was struggling with the brakes all weekend, it seemed something had gone amiss in my front suspension after eliminating several possibilities and wasted practice sessions.

These cars are violent under braking, usually if you brake too hard, the wheels start vibrating and shake the entire front end of the car like crazy....so you have to ease on the brakes a bit at first. Mine started to vibrate like it wanted to kill me, no matter how I braked. Seriously, on some corners it would be so bad that my hands would be thrown off the steering wheel and my knees were bruised from being bashed around the cockpit...it was basically undriveable. I was 2 seconds a lap slower than I had been the last time I visited Kyalami. How lame. At least the gearbox was fine...

Played around so much with the setup to try get rid of the vibrating wheels that I hardly had time to work on my racing lines and such. I qualified a hopeless 8th, with a laptime slower than when I first visited the circuit. We changed some things for the race, and I had to somehow nurse the brakes and race against other drivers...was so cool!! I had epic battles, crazy fast and violent too. I didn't really care how slow I was going in the end...I should have had 7th in the 1st race, but I was penalised and pushed back to 9th - there was a safety car period during the race, and James Leach had overtaken me as the yellow flags were out. He waved me passed, and I took back my position...which I was not supposed to do. So I got a penalty, yay. The 2nd race was legendary, I fought my ass off till the very last corner of the race, it was really tricky to drive like that but it came off okay. I ended up 6th....it looks like some of the slower guys gained a miraculous 2 seconds a lap with the new tyre compound...I really need money badly!

I definitely gained time by trying a few different lines, and a better strategy while dueling with other drivers. Even though I was 2 seconds a lap slower than I achieved last year. Next race is in Port Elizabeth, I hope I find sponsors in time so I can make that race and try apply things I am still learning from simracing. I also really need a video camera on my car to capture the insane battles I am having basically every race!! hehehe :)

Edit: Looks like I got 5th in the 2nd race....someone jump-started!

Kyalami Preparation

What have I been doing wrong in 2007? Basically everything, it's been a shocker and I'm ashamed to admit it.

With these low powered cars, concentrating on exit speed is KEY. KEY KEYKEYKEYKEYKEYKEYKEYKEYKEYKEKYKEYKEY

I followed an ex-champion around the track in the final session of the year, and I wanted to vomit. I haven't been using all of the track. Sounds daft, but there's always more, even use the damn grass sometimes if need be. The killer instinct is not there....and trust me I'm pissed off.

I've loaded up the Beetle mod in rFactor for Kyalami....it's okay. Bounces a lot, but the gearing is almost perfect when set to the shortest diff ratio. I've learned a lot by driving this thing for a few laps...and possibly where to change down to 2nd gear where I'm using 3rd on the real track. Also I've been using my right foot to brake, in some places where I don't change down a gear and use the clutch I'm going to use my left foot to brake....which is difficult in a real car, the sensitivity of the left foot is usually non-existent, after mashing it all the time on the clutch pedal. But the extra tenth gained will be crucial.

I reviewed my laps on MoTeC, and the 1st thing I noticed was that my pedal hasn't been pushing 100% throttle for the past week or so since I last checked it. Nice. The main things I could see was definitely brake earlier and set yourself for the corner apex, and get on the throttle ASAP, slide if need be, it's better than overdoing the entry. Again, a simple concept. But its really accentuated at a lower speed, and you can see it like night and day in MoTeC. The concept is easy to abuse when you're on track, you don't notice it at all. I really need to have my receptors out and about good and proper this weekend to pick up any screwups I'm doing...it's just so easy to do, I have to consciously remind myself every corner I think. EVERY corner because I am SO ANGRY. I know it sounds simple, but if you're a simracer, actively try and do this from now on and you'll find more time guaranteeeeed.

I'll see how it goes, have to make the best of a not-so-good situation. I'll aim for top6 and top5 as a miracle. I don't like being 2sec off the pace as I was last year at Kyalami, I have to change something drastically, and always try even though I may end up slower.

Bye and see you on the other side.

My strict ritual before every race - Listening to music alone

We all have our own way to focus before every race. If you see me with earphones on sometime before a race, please leave me the f#%k alone.

I have different songs for different moods....I play the 1st few songs usually, though.


Queen - We Will Rock You
Dr Stephen Baysted - GTR_Monza_Grazie (from GTR2)
Booker T & the MG's - Green Onions

Muse - Piano Thing
Rob D - Clubbed to Death

...and currently on the top of my list as a change for 2008, thrashy death metal. I'm in quite a mood to kill, destroy, eat alive, and such:

Opeth - Advent
Opeth - In Mist She Was Standing
Non-Human Level - Instincts <---- OOHHH yes, bring me success oh beautiful beast of a song.

Season 2008

Hello there.

I haven't realised the amount of people that read this blog, and I haven't really had the time to update it. Apologies. I'll try keep this going every race, and as brief as I can! (hehe)

I finished my 1st season in racing on quite a high....getting competitive, knocking on top5 for quite a while...just wished I had sponsors to get things constantly repaired :P I finished the 2007 Formula Vee Championship in 7th place out of 26 point scorers....yay. They awarded me with Rookie of the Year which was real nice....

This year I'm in desperate need of sponsors. Lotto have stopped the sponsoring of development drivers in Formula Vee, so I'm on a serious search. One would have thought that being non-white, and achieving Rookie of the Year in a first ever season of racing would get some interest....I've had NONE after some very intensive proposal planning and preparation. Which kind'a sucks, as I'd need serious backing to make every one of the 10 proposed races on the calendar. Pray for me....or even better, if you know someone REMOTELY interested, let me know and I'll be on them like a hound....well, as much as my time allows me. No such thing as giving up a dream.

Leaving for Kyalami tomorrow morning....I am extremely focused. I was embarrassed in the last Kyalami race in 2007, when it had occurred to me how pathetic my racing lines were. What exactly was I doing all year? USELESS AND PATHETIC. There is no excuse for being a dumbass, especially since I thought I learned the trade in simracing.

Not quite.

I'm on a real drive to push harder, even though I really did push my arse off last year....I am keen to pick up on things, but also ready for any disappointment that would possibly (and probably?) result from the weekend. No money, old tyres, dodge seatbelts and a damn gearbox which I hope has miraculously fixed itself. I'll see. Time to polish my helmet...

Race 5 - Phakisa Freeway

Race3 - East London

Wow. What can I say about this track.....absolutely - insane. It is SO FAST, I loved it!!!! WOWNESS :P These Formula Vee cars got up to 220kph....and my neck is sore from trying to keep my head from getting sucked out the car :)

Practise and Qualifying

Arriving at the track, us newbies got bombarded with stories of Potter's Pass, how crazy it was, the dangerous crashes there, the minimal run-off area, and how scared we were going to be. I just shrugged it off. My whole mindset was like that going there. There was no expectation, and I was going to take things as they came to me. So, I'll make my own judgement on Potter's Pass when I get to it.

I got to it in the 1st practise, and didn't take it flat out :P My mind was so focused for this weekend. I had 3 practise sessions and qualifying on the Friday, so I thought I'd go at my own pace such that I reached some sort of limit by quali. Courtney and the other new guys went balls to the wall from 1st session, I didn't feel the need to :) Nobody timing me again, Alan Holm rocked the track in a 1m32.9....the next guy was in the 1m34's hehehe. I was liking the track, the speed you reach is incredible....there's nothing like it, screw computer games :D I was also enjoying that midfield section, it was quite tricky and challenging!

Well I got going at my own pace. In 2nd session, Potter's Pass was flat out the 1st try....was awesome :) Just because it was fast. With the new Dunlop semi-slicks, this corner was just an above-average-sweep. Quite an overrated corner I thought, to be honest....so that was done. Went at my own pace to get the braking sorted out and learn some other corners....was a very physical track, my arms were really struggling hehe. But I was getting close to the limit without much risk. I didn't run off-track once....even though a couple sideways situations. Comes with the territory. I was even experimenting with some setup changes....which worked too. Things were running smoothly.

Qualifying arrived and I just put the corners together, not really on the full braking limits. Tried to slipstream others but got caught up with the drivers in other parts of the lap. Things went ok, but other drivers were eyeing me out in the pits after that. They reckon I was going well....and I think I was going ok. Ended up 5th on the grid....so things were not too bad!! But was still 2sec down on Alan Holm...the guy's engine was incredible...in practise I tried to slipstream him, but all I did was keep up!!! Down that long straight, I should have passed him even before Potter's....but I didn't even catch him.

I got noticed after that qualifying....even got a TV interview hehe....so ermm...I'm not too good at chatting in front of a camera....but I think it went pretty well :D Will see when it comes out on SuperSport later.

Race1

I was pretty focused. Knew what I had to do: just stay in the leading pack's slipstream. I could keep up with them throught the rest of the track just about, in practise I kept up with frontrunner Dennis Johns like that.

But I missed the lights going out at the start. Noob. It wasn't so bad, but the wheelspin I had added to the bad start....I just got swallowed up by the pack!! Crap...after that I thought I could get back with them if I just drove decently and kept up the pace in the slipstream....but...enter Trevor Bland. The guy was dive-bombing me in every corner he could get a chance. It was so dangerous sometimes, we actually hit wheels the one time, and I dived onto the grass to avoid him. I was not impressed at all, with this stupidity we were losing touch with the front guys.

I also started being a bit aggressive with him when defending my lines, and that became a whole other story in the pits after that....I did nothing illegal, I made sure of that. I was just harsh. Just like he was doing to me. I may have done a couple moves that I shouldn't have, but it should have been dealt with better. The politics of him knowing everyone and me not knowing anyone...things got annoying in the pits. Oh yeah, I finished that race in 8th. That fact really feels like an aside comment, since this Bland thing destroyed my name in the pits.

Race2

I put aside the bullshit going on in the pits, it wasn't that big, just a vibe I got from people that Trevor obviously got to first. Anyway, even though I was damn unfit, and really tired at the time, I got my brain in order. Watched the lights properly this time (hehe) and got a decent start off the line....just followed everyone down to the 1st corner...sliding around on cold tyres flat out through Potter's and Rifle....down into Cocabana...I enjoyed that corner. It was banked and dipped at the apex, and just rose on the way out....like a mini roller coaster going through there :)

The infield section was great, tough on cold tyres....not a lot of grip through here...but this was the part of the track that scared me the most, even though it wasn't the quickest. So easy to lose it and wipe out into the wall :/ The sweep after that section is aggressive. You have to fight the car to keep the apex, and also let go of the steering wheel with one hand to shift to 4th gear halfway through the sweep...it's intense.

The race was going well. I was keeping up with James Leach, but the lead pack was breaking up as those front guys were just insanely fast. I was having a nice dice, but keeping momentum so that we still had a chance of catching guys in front of us....I wasn't making any errors, things were going great. The only gripe I have with this moment was that I did not latch onto James's arse through these laps. I always kept this 0.5sec gap in front of me....I was not confident in running right behind him. It is something I must work on in races to come...

With 2laps to go, I was running in 6th position, working 'together' with James Leach with slipstream to catch the guys ahead of us....but then my accelerator cable snapped :( That was quite disappointing, running in a strong position, and my first DNF :( But that's racing, it was going to happen sooner or later.

So as my pace and consistency improves, I am learning other aspects of real racing too. The little politics in the pits, and even more crazy close racing. There are a lot of mindgames to play and follow, it was never just about the racing on the track. This championship is going to be interesting indeed :)